Memories, Memories...

I have been a retard wrangler for over 5 years. Since I have some time today, and Id like have something for people to read, I may as well go over some of my most memorable experiences with some of the people I have worked with:

-Sydney was an older overweight African American woman with paranoia schizophrenia and was one of my first cases. She could be so sweet unless she forgot her medication. If she forgot, or uh..refused, hilarity would ensue. She had this wild yellow-eyed expression that only meant trouble and it a tell-tell sign when a schizoid is going off the deep end. She always had the habit of calling everyone girlfriend too, probably because it was hard for her to remember peoples names. She was given to me as a full time coaching assignment because of this exchange:
(C.E.O. talking to co-worker in lunchroom full of people)
(Sydney walks over to them) "You guys better stop talking about me!"
C.E.O. - "We're not talking about you Sydney"
Sydney- "Yes you are!" (points at C.E.O and screams loudly) "You want to fuck me!"

It was then my job to babysit her and to make sure that she didn't embarrass anyone else. At one point during my coaching (and when she was in one of her bad moods) she took her false teeth out during break and started to clean them with her shirt. She then proceeded to tell me that a Ni**er (her words not mine) knocked her teeth out.

By the end of her program she want not able to work independently, but we did end up with some sort of friendship. She even learned my name. She still calls rarely (and I can understand her as long as she has her teeth in), and from time to time I will get a letter or a card for Easter and Christmas. With her poor spelling ability, she always signs it:

Your Fiend,
Sydney

Your fiend indeed, girlfriend.